For Arabella Carrie Adolfsson, there is nothing she enjoys more than going fishing during the summer near her home on a lake in Sweden, or pulling out her camera and taking pictures of the natural beauty around her.
She and her Swedish husband Stefan often take a boat out to the waters of Lake Sønmen from Torpon Island, where they live, to take in the picturesque views of the surrounding fields, forests and cliffs.
“This is a great place,” Adolfson, who was born and raised in San Diego, told CNN Travel. “Sweden is beautiful. The lakes are beautiful. The air is clean. There are no traffic jams.”
Since moving to Scandinavia in 2022 after living much of her life in California, she has come to understand the distinct rhythms of the seasons. However, she admits that Swedish winters “can be very harsh”.
There are other things to look forward to as well. Adolfsson said she enjoys the proximity to other parts of Europe. The couple sometimes drives to Copenhagen and then flies to Portugal, and other times they drive to Stockholm, four hours away, and then “hop on a plane to Latvia or Hungary.”
But almost three years after moving, Adolfsson says settling into life in Sweden came at a price she never expected.
She and her husband, who met and married in 2009, had long imagined splitting their time between Sweden, Mexico, and California. Stefan and Adolphson, who is Mexican-American, have three children and three grandchildren.
The couple first tried to live together in Sweden in 2016, moving to the southern city of Lund near Malmö, but two and a half years later Adolfsson became homesick and returned to the United States.
After what she described as a serendipitous moment in August 2022, they decided to try again. That’s when she came across an online listing for a “beautiful” fully furnished lakefront home in Torpong. Within a month they bought the property and moved in by October.
Only after arriving in Torpon did Adolfsson realize that their new home was “in the middle of nowhere.” The island is small and sparsely populated, but it takes at least a 30-minute drive to reach what she calls “civilization.”
Even though Adolfsson had previously lived in Sweden, moving to a remote part of the country was a culture shock. Days can go by without seeing anyone other than my husband.
“I really love people and being around people gives me energy,” she said. In Torpon, residents tend to keep to themselves, she added. It was difficult to make friends.
Upon returning to San Diego, Adolfson was surrounded by a large family. Not having that community was one of the most difficult adjustments for her.
“A big part of my life was taken away,” she says. “And I don’t know yet what I’m going to replace it with.” But she’s grateful that her sister lives in Germany, which is in the same time zone as Sweden.
She recognizes that life might feel different in the city, rather than on an island with no public transportation or a single restaurant.
Although Torpon Island is buzzing with activities such as kayaking, paddle boarding, and boating in the summer, the winter months are long and quiet, leaving the island more or less deserted.
Adolfsson and Stefan, who works as a substitute teacher, carefully plan a grocery shopping trip to the mainland and stock up before heading back indoors. When snow piles up on their doorsteps, they “gather inside to eat and drink.”
She learned that she needed a mental reset to adapt. “It’s important to re-create the program you’ve been running in your head and run a new one,” she says.
Adolfsson’s “new program” includes seeing as much of Europe as possible. Since moving to Sweden, she has traveled to Slovenia, Latvia, Portugal, Germany and Mallorca, making collages of her own photos for family and friends, and writing children’s books inspired by her grandchildren.
“It allows me to spend time being creative,” she says.
Video chat keeps her in touch with family and friends in the United States. Adolfson cherishes her Sunday phone calls with her family, and said her 3-year-old grandson would “hug the phone” before saying goodbye. “The technology we have now allows us to stay connected even when we become expats,” she says.
Language is also a hurdle. Adolfsson understood some Swedish before moving, but he wasn’t fluent. Although the classes helped her improve her communication, her limited skills proved to be a barrier to integrating with the Swedes. Due to some reservations she feels about Swedish culture, some adjustments were necessary.
“I’m Hispanic, and we’re like PDA everywhere,” she says. “Swedes are more reserved, so they don’t hug or kiss as much.”
The benefits are many. Her new life may be much quieter than the one she left behind in San Diego, but Arabella Carey, who works remotely, says there’s a distinct “lack of stress” that she appreciates.
The cost of living will also be more favorable. Adolfsson said “everything is cheaper” in Sweden than in California, especially housing. The water in her house is free “because it comes from the lake.”
Medical costs in Sweden are much lower than in the United States, she says. When she fell a few years ago and was hospitalized for five days, she was surprised to find that her total bill was less than $100.
She has come to appreciate many aspects of Swedish life, but cooking is not one of them. She says she misses the easy access to delicious Mexican food and finds it difficult to find “decent tortillas.” And as she grew older and came to appreciate the “finer things in life,” she found herself at odds with the “down-to-earth” Swedish culture.
She misses the ease of some aspects of life in the United States, stressing that “Sweden is not a convenient country.” She is confused by what she calls the “do-it-yourself culture,” but finds it “very nice, but way beyond my head.”
Looking back, Arabella Carey believes that had she been younger, the career change would have been easier and simpler. “The older you get, the harder it is to change,” she says.
She wishes she had understood more about the techniques and behaviors needed to “explore, integrate, and assimilate” in a new place before leaving the United States, and feels that these are becoming “necessary skills” “as globalization increases.”
For now, she remains in Sweden, returning to San Diego every few months, hoping to eventually return permanently if she can convince her husband.
Her advice for those considering a similar move in the future is to make sure you have a “connection” to the place and “understand that it will take time.”
“Sometimes it can be lonely and lonely,” she added. “And you’re going to have some tough days where you wish you could have gone home, but you’re going to make some great memories.”
