The most successful people never consider themselves successful.
This is by author Ryan Hawk, who has interviewed over 600 CEOs, businesspeople, and other types of leaders on his podcast, The Learning Leader Show. He noticed a common theme in many of these conversations. That is, they never consider themselves to have reached their peak. Hawk, 44, calls it a “never arrive, always hold” mentality. After J.J. Redick (currently the head coach of the NBA’s Los Angeles Lakers and then an active NBA player) used a similar expression while speaking to Hawk in an August 2017 interview.
It’s the idea that “no matter what happens in my life, I just want to try to get a little bit better,” says Hawk, author of the upcoming book “The Price of Becoming.”
This concept is a variation of a “growth mindset,” a term coined by psychologist Carol Dweck, which essentially means always viewing challenges as opportunities for learning and growth. Numerous celebrities, from retired tennis star Serena Williams to Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella, have publicly acknowledged that their success is due, at least in part, to their drive for continuous improvement.
Hawke has heard similar versions of the same argument from best-selling author James Clear and former Cinnabon CEO Kat Cole, among others. “There is no moment of arrival,” Hawke said. “The[successful people]I’ve interviewed are just pushing. They’re driving forces. They’re trying to make a positive impact on the world.”
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Psychologically, adopting a constant learning mindset changes your brain and behavior for the better, says Benjamin Granger, lead workplace psychologist at Qualtrics and author of “Leaders Worth Following,” published on February 24.
According to a 2017 report from the American Society for Cell Biology, practicing and learning new skills strengthens and strengthens connections between brain neurons, a process called synaptic plasticity. “Our brains are malleable, and practice and high-quality repetition lead to physical changes in the brain that manifest in very real ways in our lives,” Granger says.
If you try to push yourself out of your comfort zone, you’re more likely to make mistakes. Lifelong learners “take time[after failure]to process their emotions, assess their performance, adjust their approach and try again,” Granger says.
If you need to push yourself harder to avoid getting too comfortable in your personal or professional life, find some “truth tellers” who can hold you accountable, Hawke advises. That could be a family member, coworker, mentor, spouse, or someone you think is successful and someone who knows you well enough to call you out when you’re slacking off, he says.
“They’re willing to push you,” Hawk says. Surrounding yourself with people who keep you humble allows you to “keep progressing in the right way.”
There is at least one caveat to a growth mindset. If you constantly push yourself to improve in every aspect of your life, you can mistakenly start thinking that no matter what you do, you’ll never be good enough. Some psychologists refer to prioritizing results and accomplishments over happiness and mental health as “toxic productivity.” This can lead to burnout, overwork, and overall dissatisfaction.
If you’re having a hard time finding time to be proud of yourself, try the “double standard test,” says psychotherapist and author Chamin Ajan. Imagine that someone you care about accomplished the same thing you recently accomplished. Ask yourself, “What would I say to them?” Whatever those praises are, say them back to yourself, she recommends.
Another strategy: At the end of each day, write down three small “micro-wins” to remind yourself of your progress, Ajan advises. She calls it a daily “Done list” rather than a “To Do list.”
“These don’t have to be big milestones; they can be as simple as dealing with a difficult email or getting in a workout when you’re tired,” Ajan says. “By documenting these small victories, you train your brain to recognize and value your own consistency, which is the basis of true self-pride.”
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